In which we present a few brief rumors, some of which elude to silliness.

The house of Edward Theodore Gein, the skin-wearing and vaguely oedipal serial killer that helped inspire elements of both Psycho and Silence of the Lambs, was burned down in 1958. Also in 1958, the car which he used to haul bodies from their graves to his house was sold on auction to Bunny Gibbons, who took it around to towns, charging people a quarter to look at it. Eventually Bunny was forced to stop. Where “The Ghoul Car of Ed Gein” lurks today is unknown.

Recently, Amish communities have been asking people of German descent to breed with their girls to prevent in-breeding. Originally, they only required sperm and used the “turkey-baster method” for delivery. This process was stopped suddenly, and no one but the most powerful of the Amish sorcerors knows why, though people think it may have something to do with the strange feathered ape Ezekiel shot last year….

The government orchestrated the whole wire-tapping scandal to distract America from the fact that every single citizen has an invisible ghost made entirely of eyes floating directly behind them right now. The spell only works on people who are actual citizens, though, hence the recent illegal immigration debacle.

There’s an 8th day in the week, but no one told you about it. That’s because that’s when we get together to plot against you

You know those tags that say “Do not remove under penalty of law?” Don’t.